I'm feeling a great sense of uncertainty. I have made a decision and I will either live to love it or live to regret it. I'm not sure if it was a wise one but since I've decided to go ahead with it, I shouldn't be looking back.
Since there's little I can do about it now, I guess I should just enjoy the moment and see how things go. Hope all will turn out well.
Monday, June 15, 2009
Wednesday, June 10, 2009
Words, Thoughts, Feelings
I'm someone who likes to keep thoughts and feelings to myself. Unlike most people, I find it difficult to speak to others about my problems or unhappiness. Even when I'm misunderstood, I'd usually prefer to remain silent because I always feel that, if someone chooses to think or feel negatively about me, it will be pointless for me to explain myself. I will seem as though I'm covering up for myself. So why bother to explain?
解释就是掩饰，不是吗？
I guess that's probably why I always feel so choked and suffocated; my emotional baggage is more than what I can handle and it doesn't seem to stop expanding.
Then, one fine day I chose to speak (unwillingly) but you kept interrupting me with either how you feel or posing me with leading questions. By doing so, it's obvious that your impression of me is already clouded by your judgment. Did you seriousl
To make matters worse, you chose to reveal whatever I said to a third party when you promised to keep things between us. I know, from your point of view that it may be for my/our welfare but honestly I will prefer to just keep things confidential. After all, that was what you promised me in the first place, wasn't it?
I feel like history is repeating itself, yet again. It takes me a long time to trust others comfortably enough for me to speak. It took an even greater courage for me to reveal parts of inner self. And you spoilt it by betraying my trust in you; the trust that you will keep things confidential.
I feel like such a fool. I don't know how I should react when I see you the next time. I really wish life will end at that instant. I'm so tired and sick of all these crap.
Just what am I living for?
Then again, maybe I'm just breathing, not living.
解释就是掩饰，不是吗？
I guess that's probably why I always feel so choked and suffocated; my emotional baggage is more than what I can handle and it doesn't seem to stop expanding.
Then, one fine day I chose to speak (unwillingly) but you kept interrupting me with either how you feel or posing me with leading questions. By doing so, it's obvious that your impression of me is already clouded by your judgment. Did you seriousl
y mean it when you said you won't be judgmental? I highly doubt so. Isn't it human nature to judge others? Why did I so stupidly choose to believe you. Just what was I thinking of?
To make matters worse, you chose to reveal whatever I said to a third party when you promised to keep things between us. I know, from your point of view that it may be for my/our welfare but honestly I will prefer to just keep things confidential. After all, that was what you promised me in the first place, wasn't it?
I feel like history is repeating itself, yet again. It takes me a long time to trust others comfortably enough for me to speak. It took an even greater courage for me to reveal parts of inner self. And you spoilt it by betraying my trust in you; the trust that you will keep things confidential.
I feel like such a fool. I don't know how I should react when I see you the next time. I really wish life will end at that instant. I'm so tired and sick of all these crap.
Just what am I living for?
Then again, maybe I'm just breathing, not living.
Tuesday, June 9, 2009
十句话
I read something meaningful and thought I should share it.
第一句
如果我们之间有1000步的距离
你只要跨出第1步
我就会朝你的方向走其余的999步
第二句
通常愿意留下来跟你争吵的人
才是真正爱你的人
第三句
付出真心才会得到真心
却也可能伤得彻底
保持距离就能保护自己
却也注定永远寂寞
第四句
有时候不是对方不在乎你
而是你把对方看得太重
第五句
朋友就是把你看透了还能喜欢你的人
第六句
就算是believe中间也藏了一个 lie
第七句
真正的好朋友
并不是在一起就有聊不完的话题
而是在一起就算不说话
也不会感到尴尬
第八句
没有一百分的另一半
只有五十分的两个人
第九句
为你的难过而快乐的是敌人
为你的快乐而快乐的是朋友
为你的难过而难过的
就是那些该放进心里的人
第十句
冷漠有时候并不是无情
只是一种避免被伤害的工具
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